In 1817 novelist and poet Thomas Love Peacock wrote, “The juice of the grape is the liquid quintessence of concentrated sunbeams.” And as I nurse a fresh throbbing wasp sting on my hand, I can’t help but agree. Harvesting a few bunches from my own vines for this shoot was not without risk, such is the wondrous flavour of these nectareous orbs of historical significance. Apparently, we’ve been growing them since 6500BC; they feature strung between ancient drawings in far off places, wrapped around the wanton marble brows of ripped muscular gods, and this all before we even get to overflowing chalices of their juice lovingly made into wine and morsels of deliciousness wrapped in their baked leaves.
However you like them – crushed, stolen from swarms, or peeled and dropped into one’s mouth by a bestowed lover – they are undoubtedly the joy of early autumn. These are some of my favourite ways to eat them fresh, frozen, roasted and dried.
ICED POLEAXE GRAPES
Back in the day, my parents used the term ‘poleaxed’ to refer to staggery drunk people, as in “Oh look, that person’s completely poleaxed”. I use it to remind myself that these lovely wee alcohol-soaked crunchy frozen treats pack a surprise if one overindulges. Perfect on a sunny afternoon.
White wine, eau de vie or any clear coloured booze that takes your fancy
Fresh grapes, well rinsed
Cover grapes in your choice of tipple and soak covered overnight in the fridge. Add a little sugar if your grapes are on the tart side. Next day lift out the grapes, place in a lined tray and freeze until solid.
Serve straight from the freezer.
MY KNOCK OFF MUSCATELS
I love a dried fruit whatnot on my cheeseboard. There’s something particularly fabulous about plucking dried muscatels from twiggy branches whilst enjoying good wine and cheese. However, I’m bamboozled by the cost of them. One almost needs to harvest an organ to pay for 200 grams at fancy food stores. But fear not fromage loving friends, swanky cheeseboard style help is at hand. These are your stock standard supermarket grapes dried slow in a home oven to dehydrated deliciousness, and I can confirm almost better than an exorbitant muscatel because there’s no choke worthy seeds.
Fresh seedless grapes, well rinsed, drained and cut into small bunches.
I sit the bunches on a cake cooling rack on my oven tray. This is so the grapes have air circulating underneath.
Place in the oven for 5–6 hours at 80–100°C fan bake until withered and firm but still a little soft when squeezed.
Cool and store in airtight containers for just over a month.
Recipes and Images by Fiona Hugues
